This is the most awesomest thing ever.
If Walt Disney and I had ever met to have lunch at a Starbucks, you know, to discuss ideas and hit on the goth chicks behind the counter (he'd have a cold tuna salad sandwich..me, the black & white cookie), this is what we would've come up with after several frappucinos and crude sketches on a couple of napkins.
The NFL is going to mark the historic occasion of the first regular season game being played overseas by unleashing the terror of Jason Taylor to the masses.
That's right. It's something straight out of this shitty excuse of a blog: a giant robotic Jason Taylor!
At 26 feet, the Big JT animatronic is the biggest animated human figure ever built. It was created by an award winning engineering team in London, the SFX Compant Artem Ltd.
Some of the robot's highlights:
* Standing at 26ft tall – Big JT is almost the height of two double decker buses stacked on top of each other. It is the biggest structure of its kind ever built.
* The animatronic has moveable feet and arms and travels at 4-5mph – a single Big JT footstep covers nearly 2.5m
* Each of his custom made shoes are 6ft long and contain laces measuring 6.5m in length
* Each of the animatronics eyeballs are the size of a large grapefruit.
* Big JT’s handspan is larger than a doorway
* A specially adapted camera is fitted to the helmet of Big JT and is programmed to transmit images of what Jason ‘sees’ onto a 40ft LED screen which travels behind him. Big JT also reacts to footage of himself and team mates played on the screen - cheering touchdowns and tough tackles.
Did you read that? It has eyes that work! Holy shit. This thing is going to kill some English people. Probably because they keep referring to his size in the metric system, which is confusing as hell. But mainly because it "reacts" to the plays it sees on the screen. And if this big son-of-a-bitch is anything like me when I watch a Dolphins game, it's going to smash some shit up all over London.
Seriously, this is straight out of my wildest childhood dreams. A Miami Dolphins player turned into a giant robot! I am giddy.
Unfortunately, the Dolphins will probably not be able to use Big JT for the actual game against the Giants. Nor will they be able to have him hop a ship to come play out the rest of the season here in the States. Lord knows we could use a 26 foot giant robot. But alas, Big JT will stay in the UK. And be a completely useless wanker.
Unless Godzilla decides to attack London. Then it is so on.