I didn't want to do it. But since I'm a Dolphins blogger, I am legally bound to comment on the whole Jason Taylor-Bill Parcells brouhaha. The story in a nutshell: JT stopped by to visit the team a few weeks ago. Everybody was all like, "Hey what up, JT! You look so gay on that dancing show! Hahaha!" And then JT walked into a room where coaches -- and Bill Parcells -- were watching game-film and JT was all, "Hey I hope you're not watching game tape of some defensive ends! LOL." And nobody responded and, reportedly Parcells looked over at JT and completely snubbed him. The end.
Here's my take on this whole thing: If Jason wants to be traded, fine. I'm not mad at him. The guy gave his heart & soul to this team. He bled for this team. And he has never failed to give 100%. He sees the writing on the wall and he wants to leave our shitty team to try and play for a ring on a good team. That would suck. But I'm cool with it. He wants to dance on TV? That's also cool. On the other hand, you got Bill Parcells and his no-nonsense approach to building football teams. And he's none too happy that his team leader is prancing around on TV like some damn Nancy-boy. That's fine too.
Where I have a problem is with Parcells acting aloof with JT. And by "aloof" I mean like a total dick. If you're mad at a guy, let him know. Think he's twelve different shades of fruity because he dresses like a member of the Village People and dances on TV? Tell him so. Mad because rather than rubbing up against a hot, sweaty chick every night on a dance floor, he should instead be running around with 350 pound smelly sweaty dudes instead? Fine. But say something. Don't completely ignore the guy like he's Timmy the Oily-Faced Intern. Don't be a douche. It's pretty goddam simple.
In the end, the biggest problem is that this whole sticky-wicket has lowered JT's trade value. Because everyone knows Bill Parcells hates him. Whatever offer we were getting from Tampa on draft day is going to be the highest offer we get. Now teams will balk at anything less than a 4th-round pick. Maybe someone will fold and offer us something higher, but it's doubtful. So now because Parcells and JT are all pissy with each other, we have to either swallow a 4th round pick or let JT retire and get nothing or hope he plays out his contract with us. It's a shitty situation and it's being handled poorly. I love me the Man-Boobs but he's blowing it if this is all true. Cam Cameron was rammed up the ass with a pickle jar (metaphorically speaking, of course) by fans when he failed to embrace JT and get his advice about the team. Now Parcells is doing something much worse, and people pass it over because, well, he's Bill Parcells and he's a winner so he's allowed to be an asshole.
Bill Parcells: He's a my-way-or-the-highway guy. Advantage? The Dolphins. But let's hope that this incident doesn't actually come back to hurt the Fins.
Jason Taylor: He's a great player on the last leg of his career. Advantage? Whatever team he plays for.
And me: I use words like "sticky-wicket" to describe when two people are at odds with each other. Advantage? Anyone born in England in the early 1900s who knows what the fuck I'm talking about.