Mandatory minicamp came and went over the weekend. Here are some highlights from the guys who covered it all:
--Armando Salguero has more evidence that our passing offense still sucks. But, hey, our kicking game is looking fantastic! Wee!!
--Bill Parcells was impressed by The Golden God. He also gave Ricky Williams a fist pound. Neat! Also... wait....checking, hold on ... yup. Passing offense still sucks.
--As usual, Omar Kelly turns in a stellar re-cap. Of the guys he's most impressed with: Will Allen tops the list, along with Yeremiah Bell and Ricky Williams. So basically, we gotta hope Will stops gambling, Yeremiah stays healthy and Ricky, well, you know. Fingers crossed, everyone!!
--Salguero has a nice piece on Parcells from yesterday's Herald. The bottom line, Parcells is a Hall of Fame Douche of the Highest Order. But the man can build football teams like nobody's business. It's a solid read. Oh, and by the way, Salguero: Not gay after all. So there you go.
--Jeff Darlington says Jake Long's presence on the O-line is not only helping the left tackle spot, but the entire line as a unit. Best of all, Long appears to be making an impression on Sparano:
"I see Jake on some perimeter-pull stuff where he can get out, and he gets out in space, and you see him move his feet and do some things that way,'' Sparano said. ``I've seen him kick-step in these practices right now to a wide end and do some things that way..."
I have no idea what the fuck Tony Sparano is rambling on about here. But if it means Jake Long pancaking Mike Vrabel and ripping Vernon Gholston a second asshole, then fuck and yes to everything he just said.
--Finally, Sparano seems pleased with how things turned out this weekend. He also says that he's looking forward to seeing the guys practice in full pads once full-on training camps kick off in July:
"I always use the term if they don't bite as puppies, they don't bite," he said. "When they're in t-shirts and you see them going at it, that's a pretty good sign."
Sparano also said the team "got an awful lot accomplished." He then followed those statements by saying, "at the end of the day," and calling somebody a "fucknut." It's in his contract. Had to be done.
