Today was the first day of mandatory training camp for the Dolphins. Nothing much happened, so we can call it a day. But if you're still going to be a douche about it, click on the "Continue Reading" link below to get caught up on the day's nothingness. Otherwise, enjoy what makes this the greatest Dolphins blog in the Universe: Tits! And! Ass!:
--JT and Parcells finally met face to face and spoke for about 90 minutes. No word yet on what was said between the two. I'm betting 75 minutes out of the 90 was about Edyta and her gorgeous ass. But I'm just venturing a guess here.
--Omar Kelly reports on today's practice by giving his post a homo erotic title. I'm sure it was inadvertent. Omar points out something we all pretty much saw coming anyway -- because we're just jaded and cynical that way -- a day after the Dolphins offense looked, to use his word SHARP, they reverted back to their more comfortable abode known as The Suck:
Drops were everywhere during the morning and it stifled the passing game. Most of the time it was youngsters like Justin Wynn, Davone Bess, Jayson Foster and Selwyn Lymon dropping passes, but there were a few instances when Ernest Wilford's old fumble fingers issue caught up with him.
Omar also points out that rookie Chad Henne had the best day among the quarterbacks:
Working with the third teamers, Henne hit Greg Camarillo (notice the unit) in stride with a 20-plus yard pass on his very first throw, beating cornerback Nate Jones. Henne also threw a nice pass to Jalen Parmele in the flat that would have been for a decent gain. I give Henne the edge over McCown and John Beck today because he moved the offense more with limited weaponry around him.
Omar also reports that John Beck didn't have such a hot day, taking a couple of would-be sacks from Quentin Moses. Man, fate just keeps handing us shaky quarterbacks. Eat a dick, fate!
--Armando Salguero reports on Matt Roth:
Well, Roth is working as the starting right defensive end in Miami's 3-4 scheme. But when backups take their repetitions, he is working as a linebacker also. Obviously, being able to have skills at two positions makes Roth more valuable, which is good because last year he showed questionable skills at DE.
Questionable? I'd characterize it more as "Spray Your Pants With Shit Bad" but then again, I'm no expert.
--The Palm Beach Post reports that CB Michael Lehan may only miss 2 weeks after dislocating his ankle. That's good to hear. To be fair, we only care about Lehan's well-being because everyone else behind him on the depth chart pretty much sucks ass. Otherwise, we'd also show concern for any of the other backup corner backs if they too suffered a really painful injury.*
Well ... that wraps it up for the week.
Have a great weekend, Nation. See you Monday.