Pssst,
Hey. Brett Favre.
/looks around
Heard you landed with the Jets.
You know what?
GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!
Not only did you torture us for months on end with your endless will he/won’t he bullshit but now you’re playing for the biggest piece of shit team and fan base to ever leave their giant shit stain upon the earth. To paint a picture for you: on half your Sundays, for the next year or two, you’ll be playing for a collection of thousands upon thousands of the most drug dealing, uneducated, fucking obtuse, morally bereft, clinically fucked, ass-tasting, ass-smelling, moronic, vulgar, misogynistic, God-hating, God-fearing, horse molesting, cock-loving, learning disabled, impotent, and unwashed perennial fucking losers your dim-witted backwater Hill Billy eyes will ever behold.
You dumb shit. These are the type of people that never wipe their shitty asses after a particularly disgusting shit session that sprayed the entire interior and exterior of a toilet bowl; they simply put their boxers on and walk off. The type of subhumans that don’t appreciate anything other than eating, shitting, jerking off to SEARS catalog underwear models, farting, spitting and then repeating that cycle year after year until they die. The type of people that drag their knuckles on the ground, have retained human tails and were generally left behind as the rest of our species continued to evolve. For fucksakes, most of these people look like characters out of an Aphex Twin video. Let’s see you get to the Super Bowl with that band of losers in front of that arena of all that is wrong with the modern world.
I hope to God Almighty that on September 7th, Will Allen brings on a full-speed corner blitz from your blind side and smashes your stupid, 38-year old brain into the ground at Dolphin Stadium. You should feel privileged at that moment, for you’ll be a first person witness as the light on your self-important life begins to fade and fade until the audible cheering from the Dolphins faithful – ecstatic at the sight of your impending demise - becomes amplified, increasingly distorted then slithers away. We’ll all be witnesses to that cacophonous splendor as your last breath exits your disgraced Gang Green body.
There will be no remorse or salvation for you.
Oh, and get used to this fucking idiot:
Also, get used to this special message from the FinsNation faithful:
Fuck you, Brett Favre. Fuck you very much.
-DRK
