Good Morning, Loved Ones
I hope you manage to secure a work-free day on your way to a bar, inevitable sloppy drunkeness and indescriminate, unprotected sex. Let's get through a few links:
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Palm Beach Post runs down some not-so intriguing post-1st round WR talent at the Senior Bowl. Certainly the most talented guy out of this bunch seems to be the freakish Ramses Barden but no doubt our Big Three are doing their homework to find some guy from Tuscaloosa College or something that no one's even looked at yet.
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Begrudgingly I'll link to this. If true, this is a pretty damn important day in Dolphins football history and for the shape of things to come. Here's to hoping that Ross keeps his mouth shut while The Cockpuncher yells at him about inviting Jon Bon Jovi and his 48-year-old-mother-of-three haircut to our playoff game. How can we show any kind of toughness to a team like the Ravens when Mr. 'Midnight in Chelsea' is parading our sideline?? Just open up your wallet and stay out of the way, goblin!
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As expected, Channing Crowder will test the free agency market. All signs point to Channing arriving at various free agent signings just as the signing period ends only to land on top of someone else's bonus. I kid! I like Channing and I appreciate his honesty about his lack of big plays ("I have no big plays") but he's not a Mike and he shouldn't be getting Mike-money for his production thus far.
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Helena, Montana's most electric resident, Dan Carpenter, returned home to do...umm...well, whatever it is you do in Montana. I'm guessing that involves outdoor activities, a gun, a horse, wide open spaces, and a whole host of other shit they try to mimic out in Horse Country, Kendall.
Your suggested illegally-downloaded Friday album is:
David Byrne and Brian Eno at their finest and darkest. If you don't know, now ya know.
Welp, that's all I got. I'll be back a bit later with your most tit-tastic Weekender in quite some time.