After starting my preliminary journey today through the intellectual wasteland that is Armando's commenters for this weekly post, I couldn't help but just knock it out quickly and focus on today's topic at hand: self-imposed team gag orders. I don't know how open these teams are supposed to be considering this age where virtually everything and anything is available on these here Internets. (Believe me, The Dude will look at ANYTHING. That sicko.) In an age where inside information of any sort is at a premium (particularly in the NFL where said information can be used to expose a weakness like saaaayy Ben Roethlisberger's damaged ribs), why the fuck would Ireland, Tuna or Sparano care to make a certain shithead's job any easier? Especially when that shithead asks mundane questions, postulates erroneous concepts (note the time he shat in each of Huizengas pockmarks for bringing in a 'big name' like Parcells) and his extent of 'thinking outside the box' consists of wondering why his job isn't made easier by the very same people he is publicly critical about. To paraphrase one commenter's argument: yes, it's Freedom of Speech but that applies to public entities and personal liberties; they have nothing to do with the private sector. If you're in any major company (and certainly the Dolphins can be considered a rather large corporate entity), then inside information is on fuckin' LOVE LOCKDOWN like Kanye West, you shitshaker. Otherwise, what's the point of spending billions of dollars on inside and outside compliance training and the like?? People get fired for even talking about things openly in a goddamn elevator. Furthermore, what Dolphins fan worth his weight in tits is put off by gag orders when we won the AFC East, hosted a home playoff game and are seemingly moving in the right direction while our divisional foes are apparently not doing so hot??? You really want to tip your hand to those assholes???
So, as one intelligent commenter put it: