Tony Sparano would like us all to ease up on Ted Ginn please. Or he will personally stick a big fockin' 26 inch calf all da way up yer ass. Ya got me, you braggiole suckin mamaluke?! Miami Dolphins head coach Tony Sparano, a tough guy of all tough guys, a coach who doesn't throw around praise very often, wants you to ease up on the former Ohio State standout the last regime took with the No. 9 pick in the 2007 draft.
"From day one I've been involved with him, he's worked hard and gotten better and better. He's really learned how to be a solid pro," Sparano said...."Is it important to have one [an elite receiver], yeah. But I've been in some situations where we've not had that guy and not finished in the top ten in offense so I like where we are. They are unselfish. If you get that piece, great. Better hope it fits. But if you don't, we're prepared to go without it."
Fair enough. The guy had a decent year, yada-yada-yada. And now it seems the thing to do on message boards and blogs is to ramble off the you're-all-winners! talking points (he didn't draft himself, give the guy a chance, I'm a fan so I'm not gonna hate). Fuck you people. Shut your I only shit rays of sunshine and your he wears aqua and orange so I root for him no matter what pie holes and go shit on a churro. We hate because we love. We knock Teddy because the dude represents the abominable failure of the past regimes. Is it his fault? Probably not. I'm sure he's a nice kid. I'm sure if we met him, we'd feel bad about the things we say. We're much more comfortable mocking people behind their backs. But, until the guy lives up to his No. 9 overall pick status, he's fair game.
According to some guys who call themselves experts because they wrote some books and run a website so we're just going to have to take their word for it, year 3 is supposed to be the year a receiver breaks out. 2009 will be year 3 for Ginn. So we'll wait and see. But if he keeps running like he's being chased by a bee, then we're gonna keep peppering the words "fucking" and "useless" and "anal fissure" into sentences when we speak of Ted Ginn Jr. And as long as this guy, this guy (yea he's a Jet, but he's the balls) and this guy -- all of whom were available to the Fins at number 9 and all of whom I called for us to draft -- are still playing Pro Bowl caliber football while Teddy keeps running with that "NOT THE FACE! NOT THE FACE!" mentality, we're gonna keep on hatin.
Until I get an ass full of calf, that is. Then I'll stop talking because I'll be in the shower, weeping and curled up in a fetal position because of the shame.
