I called it. Sorta. First reaction: Guh. Maualuga, Nicks, Matthews, Laurinitis were all there for the taking. Instead, we went with the dick top player of the corner backs class. He'll be a controversial pick, that's for sure. Welcome aboard, dick Vontae. In Bill We Trust?!!

With the 25th overall pick, the Miami Dolphins select: CB VONTAE DAVIS, Illinois
6:42: Here we go. Great players still available.
6:38: Two. More. Picks. To. Go. And a shitload of talent available. So, you know, save Darius for the second round, Bill. Just sayin.
6:33: Douchebags traded their pick to the Ravens.I think Rey Maualuga is off the board with this pick. Guess not.
6:30: The Douchebags are on the clock.
6:28: No Percy Harvin for us! Thank you, Jesus.
6:25: Gotta say, Mangina is running this draft pretty well.
6:13: Five picks to go!
6:10: The Eagles traded up, so it looks like Maclin will be off the board.
5:51: Larry English is off the board. Fuck.
5:47: Tits Before The Commish!
5:45: Cushing is off the board. Shit.
5:33: Gotta say, I'm a little bummed about this Butler story. Must.... Trust.... Parcells...
5:27: Aaron Maybin, we'd like to introduce you to.... Jake Long.
5:09: ***BREAKING*** According to UConn CB Darius Butler's father, the Fins have promised him he'll be their guy at 25.
4:56: Heyward-Bey? Over Crabtree??? Thank Christ I'm not a Raider fan.
4:50: Fuck Nick Saban with a rabid marmot with gonorrhea.
4:45: TA in the comments: "NOW GET ME A FUCKING OLB TO CRUSH HIS SKULL!!" (gotta love The Nation!)
4:42: Welcome to the World of Pain, Dirty Sanchez.
4:32: Aaron Curry is a Seahawk. Best part about that was Steve Young being interrupted during his Seattle's! Gotta! Take! Sanchez! diatribe.
4:26: Seahawks are on the clock. Now is when shit starts to get interesting. Will the Jets move up to grab Mark Sanchez? I hope so. Only because I'd love to call him Dirty Sanchez every year. It's all about the dick jokes, people!
4:17: Chiefs are on the clock.
4:15: Jason Smith. Solid pick by the Rams.
4:10: Steve Young just threw Marc Bulger under the bus. What a Latter-Day dick. Keyshawn has to chime in because Keyshawn has Hall of Fame credentials. Oh wait....
4:08: Welcome to the NFL. You're a Lion now. You're fucked!
4:07: The Manning Brothers send Stafford a welcome message. What a couple of cockbaggy douches.
4:05: We're only five minutes in and Chris Berman already has me wanting to stuff my nuts into a coffee grinder. Tone it down, Boom. Fat fuck.
4:04: Was really hoping the Lions would take up the entire clock. Because, fuck it. 0-16. I think they earned it. Matthew Stafford is a Lion.
Let's do this.

With the 25th overall pick, the Miami Dolphins select: CB VONTAE DAVIS, Illinois
6:42: Here we go. Great players still available.
6:38: Two. More. Picks. To. Go. And a shitload of talent available. So, you know, save Darius for the second round, Bill. Just sayin.
6:33: Douchebags traded their pick to the Ravens.
6:30: The Douchebags are on the clock.
6:28: No Percy Harvin for us! Thank you, Jesus.
6:25: Gotta say, Mangina is running this draft pretty well.
6:13: Five picks to go!
6:10: The Eagles traded up, so it looks like Maclin will be off the board.
5:51: Larry English is off the board. Fuck.
5:47: Tits Before The Commish!
5:45: Cushing is off the board. Shit.
5:33: Gotta say, I'm a little bummed about this Butler story. Must.... Trust.... Parcells...
5:27: Aaron Maybin, we'd like to introduce you to.... Jake Long.
5:09: ***BREAKING*** According to UConn CB Darius Butler's father, the Fins have promised him he'll be their guy at 25.4:56: Heyward-Bey? Over Crabtree??? Thank Christ I'm not a Raider fan.
4:50: Fuck Nick Saban with a rabid marmot with gonorrhea.
4:45: TA in the comments: "NOW GET ME A FUCKING OLB TO CRUSH HIS SKULL!!" (gotta love The Nation!)
4:42: Welcome to the World of Pain, Dirty Sanchez. 4:32: Aaron Curry is a Seahawk. Best part about that was Steve Young being interrupted during his Seattle's! Gotta! Take! Sanchez! diatribe.
4:26: Seahawks are on the clock. Now is when shit starts to get interesting. Will the Jets move up to grab Mark Sanchez? I hope so. Only because I'd love to call him Dirty Sanchez every year. It's all about the dick jokes, people!
4:17: Chiefs are on the clock.
4:15: Jason Smith. Solid pick by the Rams.
4:10: Steve Young just threw Marc Bulger under the bus. What a Latter-Day dick. Keyshawn has to chime in because Keyshawn has Hall of Fame credentials. Oh wait....
4:08: Welcome to the NFL. You're a Lion now. You're fucked!
4:07: The Manning Brothers send Stafford a welcome message. What a couple of cockbaggy douches.
4:05: We're only five minutes in and Chris Berman already has me wanting to stuff my nuts into a coffee grinder. Tone it down, Boom. Fat fuck.
4:04: Was really hoping the Lions would take up the entire clock. Because, fuck it. 0-16. I think they earned it. Matthew Stafford is a Lion.
Let's do this.