Fuck me in the face, this video is awesome.
Upon viewing it, the first person to pop into my idiot head was defensive end Kendall Langford. Therefore, Langford will now carry the FN-given nickname: MAJOR LAZER.
I know that, for the most part, when you give a player a nickname with the word "lazer" in it, that said player is usually a quarterback.
But in this instance, said player is not a quarterback. Besides, we already have a quarterback with a laser cannon. Fuck redundancy.
Major Lazer doesn't necessarily have to be a quarterback. He's just a bad motherfucker with a canon instead of an arm who not only destroys opposing quarterbacks, but also apparently fucks up cell phone using vampires and knife wielding punks looking to harm a lady.
Also, the dude just totally has a Kendall Langford vibe to him.
Plus, we needed a badass nickname for Langford. So there's that.