... does not want that beautiful girl to marry FN commenter Tom-Ass and will, therefore, crash the wedding.
That's right. Tom-Ass is getting married this weekend. FN's deepest condolences congratulations go out to our star commenter! The Robot Chad Henne is a robot in love but, alas, Mrs. Tom-Ass's heart belongs to another. Sorry, The Robot Chad Henne. Such is life.
Mozel tov, buddy!
*her name is not actually Brandy. Tom-Ass is not marrying a hooker