Hi. I'm Pete Prisco. And I love to eat shit. For breakfast, as a side dish, as a whole meal, even in my coffee. And it doesn't matter if it's runny or thick like molasses. If it's shit and it's in front of me, I eat it. To be a true shit connoisseur like me, you have to understand the essence of shit. Really get into it, like a fine wine. Except it's not wine. It's shit. And I LOVE it!What type of shit should one eat? I'm the man with that answer! Because, as previously stated, I love shit. I mean I fucking love it! Anyway, as per your shit eating question: You're really sacrificing flavor when you look for chunkiness in shit. Chunkiness is overrated. Some shit also tastes better when salted, or run through a vacuum infuser with apple juice.
The best way to enjoy a myriad variety of shit is to get to know a particular public restroom. Not all shit is created equal. The climate and freshness are only a part of the issue; public toilets greatly influence taste. The key is to taste a whole lot of shit from different sources. We all accept that wine grapes are radically different depending on where they are grown and how the weather was that year. But shit, which is completely ubiquitous, is not influenced by geographic location or weather. Just the toilet in which it was dropped. My personal favorite are bus station restrooms. But that's just me.
There are thousands of shit varieties. All were shat by someone at some time for some reason. Most are useless and bad outside their small area of excellence--the fun is in the search for the right shit at the right place at the right time for the right reason. But if you know anything about me, I need no reason to eat shit. You don't need a reason to do what you love. You love to eat baby back ribs fresh off the grill? Go to it! Me? I'll eat shit over anything else any day of the week!
