Our boys have been ironclad on the road, winning at Buffalo, at Minnesota, at Green Bay and now at Cincinnati.
Sure we can't win at home. But who the hell is gonna win in a stadium where the focus is everything but football? Night clubs! Orange carpets! J-Lo's disproportionately huge mutant-ass! FEEENZ OP!!
Screw that. Give us every game on the road, I say. No distractions. No sideshows. And, best of all, our guys ruining the day of thousands of the other team's faithful in attendance. Haha. Fuck those people!
The biggest non-surprise of yesterday's win over the Bengals was that the offense shit the bed again in the red zone.
I'm all fluttering hearts for Dan Carpenter and his gamma ray dipped foot. But Jesus. Five field goals? Again?
And can Tony Sparano stop celebrating like we won the goddamn Super Bowl every time DC$ makes a field goal? Shit's embarrassing. Sure, five field goals will beat a team that is slightly more inept than we are (i.e. the Bengals). But that shit won't fly against the big boys (i.e. the Steelers, bullshit calls by the refs not withstanding).
And why the fuck does Brian Hartline always act like Chad Henne just threw him a rabid badger? CATCH THE BALL, shitface!
Alright... I'm done shitting on everything.
We won. And that's all that matters.
Onto Victory Monday where we'll be showing much love to Vontae Davis, Sean Smith and Dan Carpenter's foot. High-five, Dan Carpenter's foot!