Fins Nation: A Miami Dolphins Blog With Dick Jokes

John Beck Being Shopped Around

 
Although the Dolphins have yet to say it publicly, the Miami Herald is reporting that the Fins are, in fact, shopping John Beck around. Reportedly, they're looking for a fourth-round pick for The Mormon, but it's unlikely anyone will give them that.

''I could see them getting a late-round pick, maybe conditional,'' a second NFC executive said. ''Last year was a disaster and he [turns] 27'' on Thursday. As perspective, one official noted Cleveland received a sixth-rounder last September from Seattle for former starter Charlie Frye, the 67th pick of the 2005 draft. Beck was drafted 40th in 2007.

Wow. John Beck went from being the possible future franchise quarterback for the Miami Dolphins to Charlie Fucking Frye. Never thought I'd ever say that. Another thing I thought I'd never say: "Would someone please put a dick in my mouth?"

Ah well. Live and learn.

-The DUDE

John Beck Being Shopped Around

 
Although the Dolphins have yet to say it publicly, the Miami Herald is reporting that the Fins are, in fact, shopping John Beck around. Reportedly, they're looking for a fourth-round pick for The Mormon, but it's unlikely anyone will give them that.

''I could see them getting a late-round pick, maybe conditional,'' a second NFC executive said. ''Last year was a disaster and he [turns] 27'' on Thursday. As perspective, one official noted Cleveland received a sixth-rounder last September from Seattle for former starter Charlie Frye, the 67th pick of the 2005 draft. Beck was drafted 40th in 2007.

Wow. John Beck went from being the possible future franchise quarterback for the Miami Dolphins to Charlie Fucking Frye. Never thought I'd ever say that. Another thing I thought I'd never say: "Would someone please put a dick in my mouth?"

Ah well. Live and learn.

-The DUDE

Peace Be With You John Beck, Josh McCown

Man oh man.  One of these guys is seriously fucked.

Things are not looking good for the two guys on our team who have Jesus as their co-pilot.  Josh McCown and John Beck continue to get less and less reps and I sincerely doubt we�re going to keep four QBs on the final 53-man roster.   They threw, I think, a combined 4 passes on Monday.  Heck, they didn�t even participate in any of the 7-on-7 or 11-on-11 drills in yesterday�s morning practice.  They mostly stood off to the side looking mopey and sad as if someone just took a shit in their sock drawer while Penny and Henne ran the offense. 

On Monday, Tony Sparano declared that the time for considering peoples' feelings is over and it looks like the front office cockpunchers are not wasting any time in sending a couple of messages.  It�s a darn shame to see the John Beck era potentially come to a close so abruptly.  I think a majority of the fans, including us here at FN, thought there was something promising in The Mormon and, early on, he exhibited some of that grit that made him someone to root for. Plus that awshucks missionary vibe he had going for him was really quite likable.

On the other hand, it�s encouraging to see production being rewarded in our young guys.  It reinforces the idea that this regime is downright serious about the youth movement and it�s encouraging to get results out of guys like Kendall Langford, Donald Thomas, Phillip �Longshanks� Merling, Henne and hell, let�s even throw Derek Hagan into the mix for kicks.  I�m willing to endure some mediocre or even subpar success in the short term in exchange for a future filled with young, tight knit players to make up for all the years we gave away draft picks like they were burning a hole in our pockets. 

So to Beck and Josh we say: Peace be with you.

And we'll all sing �Holy, Holy� as Beck and McCown are escorted off the practice field. Or, some of us will hit a strip club with Joey Porter. Everyone has their own way of celebrating.

-DRK

Peace Be With You John Beck, Josh McCown

Man oh man.  One of these guys is seriously fucked.

Things are not looking good for the two guys on our team who have Jesus as their co-pilot.  Josh McCown and John Beck continue to get less and less reps and I sincerely doubt we’re going to keep four QBs on the final 53-man roster.   They threw, I think, a combined 4 passes on Monday.  Heck, they didn’t even participate in any of the 7-on-7 or 11-on-11 drills in yesterday’s morning practice.  They mostly stood off to the side looking mopey and sad as if someone just took a shit in their sock drawer while Penny and Henne ran the offense. 

On Monday, Tony Sparano declared that the time for considering peoples' feelings is over and it looks like the front office cockpunchers are not wasting any time in sending a couple of messages.  It’s a darn shame to see the John Beck era potentially come to a close so abruptly.  I think a majority of the fans, including us here at FN, thought there was something promising in The Mormon and, early on, he exhibited some of that grit that made him someone to root for. Plus that awshucks missionary vibe he had going for him was really quite likable.

On the other hand, it’s encouraging to see production being rewarded in our young guys.  It reinforces the idea that this regime is downright serious about the youth movement and it’s encouraging to get results out of guys like Kendall Langford, Donald Thomas, Phillip “Longshanks” Merling, Henne and hell, let’s even throw Derek Hagan into the mix for kicks.  I’m willing to endure some mediocre or even subpar success in the short term in exchange for a future filled with young, tight knit players to make up for all the years we gave away draft picks like they were burning a hole in our pockets. 

So to Beck and Josh we say: Peace be with you.

And we'll all sing ‘Holy, Holy’ as Beck and McCown are escorted off the practice field. Or, some of us will hit a strip club with Joey Porter. Everyone has their own way of celebrating.

-DRK

Sparano Pulls the Old Switcheroo On Josh McCown

Throughout the week, it was rumored that Tony Sparano was only going to play two quarterbacks in tonight's pre-season matchup against the Tampa Bay Gay Pirates Buccaneers. Early indications had John Beck sitting out the game with Josh McCown and Chad Henne getting the playing time. Now with the arrival of Chad Pennington, the quarterback situation has gotten all muddled and cloudy. So, really, not much has changed.

ESPN reported this morning that Beck will get the start, with Henne coming in and alternating quarters with him. Now the Miami Herald is confirming that McCown will indeed be the one sitting out tonight's game.

This could mean lights out for McCown, who just a week ago had visions of starting for the Miami Dolphins and sugarplums dancing in his head. Not necessarily in that order.

Or it could mean that tonight is Beck's last chance to prove he's worth a roster spot.

So tonight it will be Beck starting the first and fourth quarter with Henne starting the second and third quarter. McCown will roam the sidelines with a clipboard while Pennington suffers a shoulder dislocation trying to pour himself some Gatorade.

Meanwhile, Greg Cote loves the Pennington signing. Which makes me think those of us who don't like it are on to something.

-The DUDE

Sparano Pulls the Old Switcheroo On Josh McCown

Throughout the week, it was rumored that Tony Sparano was only going to play two quarterbacks in tonight's pre-season matchup against the Tampa Bay Gay Pirates Buccaneers. Early indications had John Beck sitting out the game with Josh McCown and Chad Henne getting the playing time. Now with the arrival of Chad Pennington, the quarterback situation has gotten all muddled and cloudy. So, really, not much has changed.

ESPN reported this morning that Beck will get the start, with Henne coming in and alternating quarters with him. Now the Miami Herald is confirming that McCown will indeed be the one sitting out tonight's game.

This could mean lights out for McCown, who just a week ago had visions of starting for the Miami Dolphins and sugarplums dancing in his head. Not necessarily in that order.

Or it could mean that tonight is Beck's last chance to prove he's worth a roster spot.

So tonight it will be Beck starting the first and fourth quarter with Henne starting the second and third quarter. McCown will roam the sidelines with a clipboard while Pennington suffers a shoulder dislocation trying to pour himself some Gatorade.

Meanwhile, Greg Cote loves the Pennington signing. Which makes me think those of us who don't like it are on to something.

-The DUDE

Tony Sparano is Subtle

Tony Sparano reportedly told his quarterbacks how things will roll Saturday night against the Bucs but, for some reason, asked them not to share this information with the media.

McCown:

''Coach told us exactly the plan, and all of the QBs are playing on the plan, so we're ready to roll,'' said McCown, who was listed atop the depth chart this week but would not say Thursday if he would start against the Bucs. ``It's nothing I'd care to discuss. If Coach wants to tell you all, he'll tell you.''

Henne:

''He has a plan,'' Henne said. ``He should be able to tell you, but not by me. I can't. That's his word. And we admire what he says.''

Beck:

"Coach Sparano has told us it's a decision he would make come game time, so come game time we'll find out,'' Beck said. ``We'll see. Everything is up to him. He's the one calling what will be going on, so we'll just do what he says.''

So apparently McCown and Henne know the plan but Beck seems to think it's a game-time decision. Other reports say that Sparano has "hinted" that only two quarterbacks would see playing-time against the Bucs Saturday. In other unconfirmed reports, Sparano was seen talking to the three QBs and saying, "One of you guys will have to sit out this game. But I won't say who until ten minutes before kickoff." Then he gestured to Beck by poking his head and darting his eyes at him, then rubbed his nose with a finger that pointed at Beck, then he put a hand over his mouth and cleared his throat, "CoughBeckCough!!"

-The DUDE

Tony Sparano is Subtle

Tony Sparano reportedly told his quarterbacks how things will roll Saturday night against the Bucs but, for some reason, asked them not to share this information with the media.

McCown:

''Coach told us exactly the plan, and all of the QBs are playing on the plan, so we're ready to roll,'' said McCown, who was listed atop the depth chart this week but would not say Thursday if he would start against the Bucs. ``It's nothing I'd care to discuss. If Coach wants to tell you all, he'll tell you.''

Henne:

''He has a plan,'' Henne said. ``He should be able to tell you, but not by me. I can't. That's his word. And we admire what he says.''

Beck:

"Coach Sparano has told us it's a decision he would make come game time, so come game time we'll find out,'' Beck said. ``We'll see. Everything is up to him. He's the one calling what will be going on, so we'll just do what he says.''

So apparently McCown and Henne know the plan but Beck seems to think it's a game-time decision. Other reports say that Sparano has "hinted" that only two quarterbacks would see playing-time against the Bucs Saturday. In other unconfirmed reports, Sparano was seen talking to the three QBs and saying, "One of you guys will have to sit out this game. But I won't say who until ten minutes before kickoff." Then he gestured to Beck by poking his head and darting his eyes at him, then rubbed his nose with a finger that pointed at Beck, then he put a hand over his mouth and cleared his throat, "CoughBeckCough!!"

-The DUDE

Yup. Our QBs Do, In Fact, Suck Balls

So this weekend was all about Saturday's intra-squad scrimmage between the defense and offense. While the Right Arm of God himself watched from the sidelines, Josh McCown, John Beck and Chad Henne pretty much sucked the place up nice and good.

The Mormon was well aware of the presence of the Great One, and was a tad embarrassed: 

"I'm sure we would have liked to have done a little bit better," Beck said.

"I'm sure it brought back a few memories for Dan. I'm sure he was standing there, maybe wishing he was still throwing it around a little bit."

If he had joined in, Marino, 46, might have been the best quarterback on the field.

During a three-series span while Parcells and Marino chatted, the Dolphins' three quarterbacks - Beck, Josh McCown and Chad Henne - completed 2-of-22 throws.

Both were screen passes.

Holy shit shoes that's bad.

Meanwhile, Henne supposedly did the best, as he was the only one to complete 50 percent of his passes. But 50 percent of shit is still shit:

John Beck went 9-for-22 without a touchdown and had a sure interception dropped by Charlie Anderson. Henne was 10-for-18 with a touchdown to David Kircus, but went 1-for-5 on his second series. Josh McCown was 7-for-22 with two touchdowns, one interception to Travis Daniels, and another dropped interception by Quentin Moses. During one stretch, the quarterbacks combined to complete 2-of-22 passes.

What word means the exact opposite of "news?" Whatever it is, say that and then "Our quarterbacks fucking suck." Same thing.

-The DUDE

Yup. Our QBs Do, In Fact, Suck Balls

So this weekend was all about Saturday's intra-squad scrimmage between the defense and offense. While the Right Arm of God himself watched from the sidelines, Josh McCown, John Beck and Chad Henne pretty much sucked the place up nice and good.

The Mormon was well aware of the presence of the Great One, and was a tad embarrassed: 

"I'm sure we would have liked to have done a little bit better," Beck said.

"I'm sure it brought back a few memories for Dan. I'm sure he was standing there, maybe wishing he was still throwing it around a little bit."

If he had joined in, Marino, 46, might have been the best quarterback on the field.

During a three-series span while Parcells and Marino chatted, the Dolphins' three quarterbacks - Beck, Josh McCown and Chad Henne - completed 2-of-22 throws.

Both were screen passes.

Holy shit shoes that's bad.

Meanwhile, Henne supposedly did the best, as he was the only one to complete 50 percent of his passes. But 50 percent of shit is still shit:

John Beck went 9-for-22 without a touchdown and had a sure interception dropped by Charlie Anderson. Henne was 10-for-18 with a touchdown to David Kircus, but went 1-for-5 on his second series. Josh McCown was 7-for-22 with two touchdowns, one interception to Travis Daniels, and another dropped interception by Quentin Moses. During one stretch, the quarterbacks combined to complete 2-of-22 passes.

What word means the exact opposite of "news?" Whatever it is, say that and then "Our quarterbacks fucking suck." Same thing.

-The DUDE