Fire Jeff Ireland Banner Part Two: Electric Boogaloo


Too much embarassment.  Too much stupidity.  Too much humiliation.

We’re gonna make our voices heard AGAIN.  Will it work this time?  Probably not.  But it will be funny to laugh at them all over again.  Fuck it!

Click here for a link to the donation site and give what you can.

Go Dolphins

10 replies on “Fire Jeff Ireland Banner Part Two: Electric Boogaloo”

In the Tibet of my youth, monks in the monasteries of the mountains came down into the valleys and cities to beg for food. In return for a full bowl of food (and an occasional reach-around under the robes), the monks would pray and offer spiritual advice and council. The Tibetans know the value of these monks (and reach-arounds). Without them, where do we get the advice, the commentary on the struggles of life and the deep wisdom of years of meditation and contemplation? Food is but a small token of what is due these noble spiritual leaders.

Like a monk, you now come to our doorsteps once again with an empty bowl but a full heart. A heart full of the most honest, straight-shooting commentary this side of the Pecos (and that gets a little wierd ’cause I’m not sure which way the Pecos flows and I’m NW of that and I think it flows SE so that puts me kind of parallel or pointed towards the headwaters but not really close anyway so what the fuck-ever it was just some stupid fucking colloquialism but I digress). This empty bowl is like our football consciousnesses…ready to be filled, but never satisfied because no one ever puts steak into beggars’ bowls. They put the old, gelatinous oatmeal, or the slimy leafs of spinach in the corners of the bags, or the ends of bread loaves, or [worse] PBR. Oh sure, they love the prayer and the free advice, but do they ever put out? Nooooo. Not that I’M eating ‘Jell-O’atmeal anymore. Those days are looong gone (Thanks MCA, RIP and bless)…Ima surf-n-turf-eatin’ mutha fucka in here-ah these day. I’m just sayin’, our football bowls have been kicking us in the football balls for a long time, and it is time we start kickin’ back!

The least we all can do is give our food (money) to you so that you can continue to guide us with sage advice, like, “Mr. Ross: Save our Dolphins, Fire Ireland” and other great things like, “Amazeballs”. Everyone should donate to this worthy cause. Me, of course, I’m just a simple monk (cough,cough) and I have nothing to give but this: my blessing on this endeavor. May it bear fruit and seed the Finsnation with wisdom beyond its words.

And if you don’t give your money to this, I’ll leave you text messages and voice mails threatening violence and calling you “Nigga”. You better not fucking save them!

Go Phins.

Other suggestions for banner messaging:

– End the embarrassment. TIME TO CLEAN HOUSE.
– Is your mother a whore? TIME TO CLEAN HOUSE.
– No stadium money for Ireland and Philbin. TIME TO CLEAN HOUSE.
– I rather buy this banner than tickets. TIME TO CLEAN HOUSE.
– No stadium money for losers. TIME TO CLEAN HOUSE.
– Stop embarrassing our city. CLEAN HOUSE.
– I don’t wear my jersey in public anymore. TIME TO CLEAN HOUSE.

I want to give $100 to fly the banner again at the next home game. I tried clicking the link provided and the donation page states that donations are no longer being accepted. Is this like Obamacare’s website or what? We Must Fly the Banner! Tell me how to give!

As a non-spiritual lawyer, I had nothing to give but money. Please be careful if two girls ever ask to borrow your bowl and call it a cup.

Ireland’s inability to pick talent whether thru the draft or free agency is killing this team. He needs to go. He’s got no idea how to run this team other than to run it into the ground. When you have a team that’s still starting John Jerry on the offensive line there’s something wrong. Both he and Incognito should have been upgraded two years ago and we’re still looking at the same shit. It’s a cluster. Top that off with a wuss of a quarterback who couldn’t throw the long ball to save his life and it’s even more of a cluster. This team is fucked and as long as Ireland, Tannehill and guys like Jerry are there it’s not getting any better.

After all of this going on you can only post about flying a banner? This website is just a half n****r piece of shit.

Five years down the road into the Jeff Ireland Era (or Error) and this is what Stephen Ross and Dolphins fans have to show for it.

Yup, well done.

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