(tumbleweed scurries across the dirt road of FinsNation town’s Main Street as The Dude and DRK sit on a stoop and wipe the sweat off their brow, pull at some ‘Rebel Yell’ whisky whiskey)
This here’s The Doldrums, boys and girls. Maybe some of y’all never heard of it what with all them coordinators and what not bein’ hired and that there Super Bowl bein’ played. But ’round these parts things get a lil’, well, DRY during the Doldrums. So here’s some Kate Upton D’s (fer ‘Doldrums’) pressed up together ta keep ya honest when the days are hot and the nights are long. I reckon she may have been sullied by that there Mexican some time ago but I betcha she clean as a whistle now.
Well, fer now anyway…
(DRK spits on floor, tips hat, smiles 4-tooth grin and walks away into the dust)