Brandon Marshall Catches 4 TDs in Game That Doesn’t Matter


While I admittedly didn’t watch much of the game at all, I turned it on after my post-Heat nap to find Marshall totally fuckin’ BALLIN’ out there.  True, there’s more defense being played at a Banyan Elementary recess football game but it still feels sorta nice to have a Dolphins player do some pretty badass shit, including the HOLY FUCK catch pictured above.  Pretty badass when a dude has 6 catches and 4 of those are for touchdowns (along with 176 receiving yards, to boot).  As Arrrrrmando stated (and I gotta admit that his blog articles have been a bit more sufferable lately and HOLY SHIT I CAN’T BELIEVE I JUST TYPED THAT OUT), it shows that Marshall can be an elite player when paired with comparable talent.  Put him with a puppet or a robot or any other object that lacks a semblance of a soul and you get an irrate, disgruntled, annoyed child (note: he’d probably become this anyway over time with anyone) that suddenly can’t get open despite his obvious physical gifts.  Shit, he was killin’ it with Jay Cutler and Cutler’s the biggest Mr. Wompy Sadface maybe ever!

As Marshall said:

“It says a lot when you’re playing with these type of quarterbacks.  They just put it in the right place and I just made the play. Hats off to those guys throwing me the ball.”

Matt Moore Puppet Dejected Falling Puppetmaster Strings In The Corner of The Room Sad Face Pinocchio!!!!

Point is:  stop dickin’ around and get a REAL fuckin’ QB.  Draft one every goddamn year until you hit on another one.  Even the stupid Patriots drafted Mallett and they have one of the best QBs ever as their starter – as epically douchey as he is and all.

Anyways, congrats to Brandon Marshall on a truly BEASTLY performance.  Oh, and please stop being so deliberate in your answers!!!  Wish I had a nickle for every ‘you know what’ he uttered.  Goytrain!

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